How a ‘soccer mom’ went after her son’s US men’s team coach and sparked a scandal

At least that was the case until an extraordinary scandal involving a sulky prodigy, his dad’s mea culpa, feuding friends and talk of domestic abuse, takedowns and blackmail.

The discord between the USA’s head coach, Gregg Berhalter, and his best man, the former Manchester City and Rangers star Claudio Reyna, has led to debates on ethics and parenting as well as tactics. Their wives are also involved, as is Reyna’s son, Borussia Dortmund’s disgruntled midfielder Gio, who was used sparingly in Qatar.

The rift led to Berhalter giving an unusual interview to the Harvard Business Review this week. It had been arranged before the story exploded and he felt duty bound to honour the arrangement. “Our entire family is saddened by these events,” he said. “The worst part of it for me is my heart aches for my wife because it was her story to tell.” He went on to speak of his team’s “super high potential” before confirming: “Of course I’d like to continue in my role.”

So why isn’t he – at least for the USA’s forthcoming training camp? On Tuesday Berhalter posted his first and only tweet. It stated that during the World Cup an individual had approached US Soccer saying they had information that would “take me down”. Berhalter explained the nature of the threat: one night in 1991, when he was 18, he had been drinking with his now wife Rosalind in a bar. The pair had a heated argument. “It became physical and I kicked her legs. There are zero excuses for my actions: it was a shameful moment and one that I regret to this day.” Berhalter said he had counselling in the aftermath, has never repeated the behaviour and, after a split of seven months, reunited with Rosalind. They have four children and celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary at the weekend.

US Soccer said it had heard about the allegation against Berhalter on December 11 and had appointed a law firm to conduct an independent investigation into that and “potential inappropriate behaviour” towards staff by people outside the organisation. Anthony Hudson, son of the Chelsea legend Alan, assumed temporary control of the team. Berhalter, whose contract expired at the end of last year, remains in contention to carry on, pending the outcome of the investigation and review of the past four-year cycle, but it is believed US Soccer is also interested in Jose Mourinho. As peacemakers go, the Roma coach may seem an unlikely replacement, but it would certainly shatter allegations that US Soccer is a closed shop.

A day later the story took another twist. Claudio Reyna’s wife, Danielle, admitted she was the one who had told Earnie Stewart, the US Soccer sporting director, about the old domestic abuse incident. This was because she was annoyed that Berhalter had appeared at the HOW Institute for Society’s Summit on Moral Leadership on December 6 and stated that a player had come close to being sent home from the World Cup. For anyone who had been watching, this was a gossamer-veiled reference to Gio.

In her statement, Danielle said: “I wanted to let him [Berhalter] know I was absolutely outraged and devastated that Gio had been put in such a terrible position, and that I felt very personally betrayed by the actions of someone my family had considered a friend for decades.” In addition, Claudio admitted sending messages to US officials, bemoaning the lack of playing time Gio was getting in Qatar, but denied making threats.

Berhalter’s remarks were supposedly private, with the HOW conference conducted under Chatham House rules, but the cattiness was out of the bag. We now know Gio apologised to his teammates for his attitude during the World Cup, which he said was prompted by Berhalter telling him before the tournament that he would have limited game time. Danielle left nobody in any doubt about her perception of the rights and wrongs, adding: “Gregg had asked for and received forgiveness for doing something so much worse at the same age.”

The 1991 incident may yet spell the end for Berhalter. It is less than a year since the US Soccer Federation settled an equal pay lawsuit with the national women’s team for $US24 million, and only three months since an investigation concluded that there was systemic verbal and emotional abuse, and sexual misconduct, in women’s soccer in the US. Cindy Parlow Cone has steadied the ship since taking over as US Soccer president from the calamitous Carlos Cordeiro, but dealing with a historic abuse case involving the men’s head coach is a new test of her talents.

One school of thought is that the US needs to be more outward-looking. That Claudio Reyna felt he could gripe about his son’s treatment to his close friends Stewart and Brian McBride, the men’s general manager, shows the ties that bind can be too tight. That insularity was also evident when Berhalter got his role in 2018, at a time when his brother, Jay, was US Soccer’s chief commercial officer. A year on and The New York Times revealed scathing critiques of the federation by workers who complained of a toxic culture, with power held by a small group of long-serving executives.

What makes this story more remarkable is the history of those involved. Berhalter and Reyna were teammates in high school kickabouts in New Jersey and then at the World Cup for the USA. Their wives were college room-mates, teammates and best friends. In 2021 Berhalter’s son, Sebastian, was on loan at Austin FC, where Reyna is the sporting director. The loan was not extended and he was sent back to Columbus.

Two best friends coaching each other’s sons while having the ear of American top brass, who are friendly with their wives, shows international football is a small world in the USA. The remark of the former head coach Bruce Arena – “there is nothing about soccer we don’t know” – smacked of an unwillingness to learn. Jurgen Klinsmann, an outsider, had been sacked from the role in 2016, and that was that.

The sorry scenario also plays to the trope of the rabid American parent. Twenty-two years ago, at the tragic end of this spectrum, a man in Boston pounded an ice hockey coach’s head into the rink because his ten-year-old son had been elbowed during a game. The coach died the next day. In 2019 Operation Varsity Blues exposed how 33 parents had paid $US25 million to bribe college officials so their children could get into top universities, often by fabricating their athletic credentials. At the very least Berhalter v Reyna is a feud for fresh thought.

– The Sunday Times

Originally published as How a ‘soccer mom’ went after her son’s US men’s team coach and sparked a scandal